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Happy Anniversary to Me!

Ten years ago I married my best friend….

*gag*

More like:
Ten Year’s!  Holy Shit!

I can’t believe he’s put up with my nonsense for ten whole years.  That’s like “grown up” time right there.  I guess this means I am a grown up?  Well, that just sucks because I haven’t figured out what I want to be when I grow up yet.  I guess I missed that boat.

Honestly, the past ten years have gone by really fast.  I think having three boys has something to do with that.  It hasn’t always been easy…he annoys me.  A lot.  But we really get along well.    It’s hard to explain.  He still completes my sentences and I usually will pick up the conversation he is having in his head.  Do you ever just start talking and the other person says, “wow, I was just thinking that?”  Well, we do that all the time.

He didn’t know what he was getting himself into when he married a young gal like me (18 years is our age difference).  He was “done” with kids.  HA, I showed him!  And at 50 something years old, he didn’t expect to be having all the troubles a young married couple would face.  But he does his best and I appreciate him for that.

But, here we are.  Ten years later.  It is shocking to a lot of people that we made it this far.  Bob is a good person and a good dad and I love him despite his annoyances.  That my friends, is true love.

PS.  I win.

 

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This is Why It’s Bob’s Fault the Pool is Inside Out

We have a cheap little Intex pool that we bought in 2009.  It is 10 feet in diameter and was a perfect size for the boys…in 2009, not so much now.  We did not set the pool up last summer (2010) because of the San Diego water shortage.  We did not want fined for filling up the 950 gallon pool.  This year, the ban was lifted and they were thrilled to get to use their pool again.

I went about the chore of setting it up last week.  It was about 100 plus degrees with high humidity.  It sucked.  But because I’m a good mom, I wanted the boys to be able to swim and cool off.

I dragged the pool out and laid it where I wanted it to go.  I was a sweaty hot mess.  I was fighting a head cold.  The boys were impatiently “helping.”  I got it all smoothed out and was trying to figure out how to attach the pump again.

More sweating.

It was gross.

I was thinking “why the hell is the pump hose attachments on the wrong side of this damn pool?

Bob chimed in, “I think the pool is inside out.  Shouldn’t all the warnings and stuff be on the outside?”

NO BOB!  This is how it goes.  I’ve done it before.  Just go back in the house why don’t you?

I proceeded to disassemble the pump hose attachments and switch them so they were facing the “outside.”

I got the pump attached and managed not to pass the hell out while blowing up the outside floaty ring (because Bob couldn’t find the attachment for his air pump).

I began to fill the pool.  The boys cheered.  I was Mother of the Year!

A few hours later, the pool is full but it does not look right.  The “fill line” is on the outside and that just doesn’t make any sense either.

I send Bob a text, “So, what do you think would happen if the pool was inside out?”

No answer.

He calls me later and him and my dad are just laughing their butts off at me.

Screw them.

It is Bob’s fault that the pool is inside out.  If he had just left me alone, I would have realized I made a mistake and would have corrected it.  But, because he had to butt in and tell me I was wrong, I ignored him.  Men should know by now that they should never tell a woman what to do.

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Bob Done Gone and Pissed Someone Off

I married an “older man.”  I’ve mentioned before that he is actually one month older than my own mother {a fact she loves to remind him of}.  But while he is older than me {and my mom} he is by no means “elderly.”  He has three young sons {and one adult son}, a couple of beautiful grandchildren.  He works full time, likes to camp and play video games.  He is nowhere near retiring and certainly not planning any “arrangements.”

Not that talking about funerals and burials wishes is bad…you know…just in case…over tequila shots or something.

Recently, though, he has begun receiving lots and lots of mail from the AARP.  Then retirement home mail started arriving.  My mom and I got a good laugh out of it because my mom is the same age and has never received anything at all about retiring or “growing older.”

Then Bob got a letter about cremation services!

DUDE!  He’s not even retired!!

How or why Bob got put on someones “list” is unknown to us.  But I guess I better buy a dress…they seem to know something that we don’t.